My Return to the Blogosphere, Starting with My Resolutions.

Well I'm back from my little psyche break.  I think I have a kind of theme and "mission" to accomplish with this blog.  I will tell you about it in a future blog.

To start things off, here are some of my resolutions for the year, though loosely made for I'm not good at too much structure and need a little flexibility.

I plan on getting more focused on my craft, both literary and musically.  I plan on finishing a novel or novella and at least one or two short stories this year.  I want to make a series of poems that have somewhat of a narrative and theme.  Additionally, I also want to compose a series of songs each with relatively the same theme and narrative.  It could be that the poems will combine to be the lyrics, but it just depends on what each series is about and what tones each has.  And I would like to keep a steady stream of blog posts coming through here.  There are other things I'd like to have accomplished (in regards to my knees and such), but I will leave you with these.  Hopefully I'll have gotten at least some of them completed.  Time will tell.

What are your resolutions, if you have any?

A Revamping.

I am currently revamping a lot of things in my life, mainly my writing (stories and songs, both) and blogging.  What I'm going to do for the next week, at least, is figure out what my direction will be for both writing and blogging.  In the past week I've had somewhat of a change of psyche, I think.  In addition, I have been looking at my craft in a different way.  What I will be doing for this blog in the next week or so is find the purpose, the mission, of this blog.  And after doing so, I will try to keep a steady stream of entries coming.  I will try to find my Blog Voice, if you will.  And this blog is not just for others (though that is very important), but it is also for myself.  It helps to focus my thoughts on different subjects.  So bear with me, and hopefully I will be able to make a fun/serious/etc blog that will be much improved and fit and reflect me.  I will be back with a new blog soon.

The Hovering Darkness: A Demon.

This has to do with what many people have to go through.  Now, when I say demon, I don't mean addiction, although addiction can feed this demon.  I am not an addict.  I'm not sure what this demon is, but I think some of us are born with it.  I think it resides in our souls, waiting and feeding off all negativity that comes into our life.  It is not a demon with intelligence; it is an idiot demon.  All it knows is to feed and gather darkness and expand until it engulfs you.  It is like a storm, gathering strength until it releases and unleashes a torrent of hopelessness that cripples you.  This is what I've had to go through the last few days.  It is not the first time I've felt and been engulfed by this demon's storm.  And I know it will not be the last.  It hovers as it feeds, just at the edges, and waits.

Many people I think have this in their souls.  Trent Reznor (Nine Inch Nails and How to Destroy Angels, if you don't know him) I think has had one of these demons.  He said in an interview that he is past the darkness, that he is happy, but that he knows he could fall into it again.  Right now, I think my demon will be at the edges for awhile, and that the storm will come again.  Mainly because of the disease I have in my bones, which brings on excruciating pain.  I'm hoping that when I am able to get the treatment I need, the surgeries and all that, I think I'll be able to keep the demon at bay, hopefully for good.  But as it is, I'll have to weather the storm.  But even once life for me gets better, I'll have to stay prepared for the dark storm.

But don't worry overmuch about me.  What helps to keep the demon at bay is the help of friends and family.  It also helps to pour some of the darkness into my craft, being music and literature.  I'll make it through.  I have a strong will, and I have things to look forward to.

I will make it through.

Thanks for listening.

Welcome to Seasons: In Darkness We Begin...

Steel grey sky darkening to a gloaming of uncolored view.

What better way to celebrate Halloween than with Lovecraft.

We are now in the darkness, the dying of the year.  The air is filled with burnt chill and that smell is the year rotting in the most beautiful of ways.  This time of year sends a current through my whole being (as I'm sure it does many of you).  This time is called many things:  Halloween or All Hallows Eve, Eve of All Saints, and Samhain to name a few.  It is said that this time is the fraying of the border between this living realm and that of the dead.  Whatever it is that causes the charge, whether it is a fraying and the dead are closest to us or it is the dying of the Year as if it were a living being (which in some cases it is), this is a time filled with ghost images of memory that are most vivid and a familiar coolness that denotes that this year is on its last legs and another is on its way (whether we want it or not).

Now, the reason I chose to start this blog on Halloween is connected to my love of mythologies, especially Celtic.  In Celtic myths, most, if not all, start on Samhain, as a kind of symbolism of a cycle, starting and ending in darkness.  It was the last harvest, when they got everything ready for winter, the dying of the year, which is probably where the belief in the dead being closer came from.  To a Celt all important quests began on this day, the festival of the dead, or Féile na Marbh in Gaelic. This will be a blog about the journey of myself, of my mind, and with my Celtic ancestry I will keep to this tradition (but hopefully my ending will be a great deal happier than that of the Celtic myths that mostly end tragically).

What I'll be blogging about will be many different subjects.  I am a thinker.  Most of my time is spent in my own head.  And my outlets are two things:  writing and music.  This blog will help me with both, I think.  And I will not blog without research.  I'll try to be meticulous in my blogging, try to find all the sources I can in order to make this more of an "educated" rant instead of a simple rant.  There will be blogs about politics and religion and other social things, stuff in the news, etc; there will be ones about science; some about books and music, both, most of the time, being those books and musicians I like and my attempt to lure you to try them; and there will be ones about my journey as an aspiring writer and musician.  These will be my observations and not absolute truths (if those exist).  These will be opinions, my opinions.  If you agree or disagree with a point I make, an opinion I make, feel free to comment (in a peaceable manner, please).  You don't have to have an account on here to post a comment, just click "Post a Comment" then where it says "Comment as" scroll down to "Name/URL"; you don't have to have a website, just type your name and then post your comment.  (Note:  This paragraph is reposted on the "about seasons" page.)

Here is something to start it off.  I will be periodically posting lists of books, stories and authors that I recommend everyone read.  Here are a few for All Hallows Eve:

-  "The Call of Cthulhu" and "The Dunwich Horror" by H.P. Lovecraft.  Hell, for Halloween, anything from Lovecraft would be good.  And you can find most of his stuff for free.
-  "The White People" and "The Great God Pan" by Arthur Machen.  Another whose work can be found for free on the internet.
-  The Gunslinger and Pet Sematary by Stephen King.  Another author that has good horror stories and novels for Halloween.
-  City of Saints and Madmen ("Dradin in Love" and "The Transformation of Martin Lake" are some unsettling ones that are really good; it is the first book in the Ambergris series, which is one of my all time favorite series and worlds) and Veniss Underground (which is a science fiction novel that contains a corpse cathedral... what more could you want?) by Jeff VanderMeer.
-  Perdido Street Station by China Miéville.  A good one with monsters and nightmares, with a lot of politics and science based in a steampunk world, Bas-Lag.  Another of my all time favorite series and worlds.
-  The Island of Dr. Moreau by H.G. Wells.  It's actually pretty creepy. This is also free on the internet.
-  And "October in the Chair" by Neil Gaiman.  It seems a fitting story for October and Halloween, dark and a very good story.

Well now this journey starts, and I hope you will join me.  My next blog should be posted very soon, and I will let everyone know by Facebook and Twitter.  Until then, enjoy your Halloween and take it easy.

When will I start posting?

I will start posting blogs on Halloween.  I will explain why when the time comes.  Until then take it easy.